The brand in you
If you do not brand yourself, you are the last person in the queue for husbands. At that position, no man can see you. And so what is the brand in you? Or are you a commodity? Branding yourself is the better option. Why?
One: It improves your credibility, visibility and chances of getting a husband because you have packaged yourself as per the needs of the market.
Two: Branding makes you unique. It helps you to stand out from the crowd and to add value to a suitor. It brings out the unique selling points in you which can attract and keep suitors.
Three: Branding gives you an identity. It transforms the qualities and assets in you into a marketable product.
Four: Branding helps you to tell a good story about yourself.
Five: It makes you more marketable and helps you to adjust quickly to changes in the marketplace. It also helps you to command premium attention. There are so many reasons to brand you but these five are the key.
In the 2M, it appears that many single women are searching for few husbands. If that is so, what will give you the edge over other women is branding. You are wondering how to brand yourself? We shall discuss this in the next chapter. Before you get there, consider the 10 practical steps you can take to put your brand to action and get a husband quick. I call it The 10 Steps Action Programme.
1. Get his attention
2. Show him you care
3. Enter his life and minister to his needs
4. Offer solutions, do not be a problem.
5. Put your strength to action.
6. Make him experience your content
7. Put your talent and gifts to work for him.
8. Be part of him, do not dominate him.
9. Partner with him. Be his helpmate
10. Complement his life, job, career or business
When you take these steps as you search for a husband, you will fully understand why you have to brand yourself. If you are not branded, you cannot get the attention of suitors.
If you have not been able to get a husband, stop blaming spiritual forces, your relations, friends or the economy. Have you checked yourself? You could be the person spoiling your chances without knowing it. You may have done so by making yourself a commodity. That means you have no identity, no USP that can attract suitors.
The latest market news is that as challenges increase in working and living, men are looking for branded women to marry. Being branded assures them that such women are credible and have quality. But most brides the men see are commodities. And such women even want branded husbands.
Women can say openly what they want in Mr. Right. Men hardly do so. They keep it to themselves as they search for wives. That is their style. They know if they speak, women within their reach will begin to pretend just to get a husband. Not all men are branded though. But why should they be so when they are the buyers in this market? It is the product that should be branded not the buyer. Case established.
This is where successful and professional women loaded with cash and assets get it all wrong. They think their wealth, sophistication, celebrity status and connections can pull in husbands. These factors can no longer do this for reasons we will discuss later. Any woman who does not manage her success sensibly may remain single. There are many of such successful women around who are still wondering, “What did I do wrong?” Now, you know.
Contradictions
While money and material resources can be a plus for a man in this market, it can be a minus for a woman. When a rich man displays his wealth, women flock to him. If a woman does same, Nigerian men will run away. Why? Their ego is threatened.
The lesson you should learn here is that fame and wealth can reduce the marital value of a woman in the perception of suitors. But they can increase the value of a man. This is the market condition in Nigeria. That is why some female celebrities and successful professionals find it really difficult to get husbands. If you want a husband, you have to brand yourself to get serious suitors. In Nigeria, when a man shows commitment to marry a woman, he is said to be serious.
Stop griping that you cannot get a husband. You can. The first step is to understand how the market operates, transform you into a brand and get the attention of suitors. May be you are already branding. But you are doing it the wrong way by concentrating all your efforts on your hair and body, but there is no effort to build your character or develop the qualities inside you.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Bridal Marketing
Single women need help
There is a social time bomb ticking in many parts of the world. If it is not detonated, it will explode with fatal consequences. Simply put, single women above 30 are finding it increasingly difficult to get husbands, whose supply seems to be reducing daily while demand for them is increasing. Why is this so? There are many reasons. Some are economic, others cultural and sociological. And the message is clear: The struggles of single women to get husbands are building into a destructive explosion. They need help to get the husbands they desire.
For some women, many forces stop them from getting husbands. Some of these forces are spiritual and psychological. And they have become a big burden for thousands of women worldwide. This is causing pain, emotional turmoil and regret for many marriageable women and their families. Yet no help seems to be coming. That help has come with this book.
The joy of every parent is to train his or her daughter through life and see her get married. This is the desire of every woman. And when she does not marry as at when due, her expectation of becoming a wife and a mother turns into frustration. This has to stop! What does it take for a parent to train a daughter and prepare her for marriage? Plenty of investments, training, care, advice, sacrifice and guidance over the years to equip her properly for the marital challenges she will face when she becomes a man’s wife.
So, what would be the vibes in any family where a girl born 30 years ago matures into a woman; she is well educated and ready for marriage but no husband is forth coming? Family quarrels will begin. Big daughter turns against her mother. This is the trademark of “senior girls” who want to get married, but the vicious forces rocking the market are making it increasingly difficult for them to do so.
The husbands are still there in the market no doubt. But as technology, markets and economies change, so are men changing their bridal perception and attitude to marriage. Besides, many marriageable men especially in the battered economies of African countries are becoming increasingly poor as income falls. If a man is not financially able, how can he marry? A good number of men have discovered to their dismay that though they are willing to marry, they are not able. There is pain on both sides of the marriage divide.
But the pressure is more on women because their biological clocks are ticking. The older they become, the less marketable they become in the marriage market. Not so with men. Even at 45, a man can comfortably marry a 20-year old girl so long as he is financially able. This challenge explains the statement, “I can and I will.” Five words loaded with desire and action. The problem I have identified for men and women, who want to marry, is not with the desire- I want or I will. It is with the ability to fulfill that desire, that is, I can.
The critical stages
Thousands of women above 30 years desire to get husbands. They are willing. But some of them cannot. Even if they can, they do so with pain, tension and delay. For men, it is a 50/50 split. One half wants to marry, but low-income power makes it difficult for them to do so. The other half can, but they are not willing. This one is a bigger problem. So when a single woman gets entangled with this can- do but will- not man, and she thinks she has everything going for her, she is in trouble.
She just cannot understand why Michael cannot propose marriage. She throws everything into the relationship, giving it all her time, emotions and self only to be disappointed. Then she weeps: “Oh God, I gave him everything.” What she fails to understand is that her strategy was wrong. All her attention was on the man’s ability- I can, without focusing on his commitment- I will, where the real problem lies.
Now you can understand why many relationships do not end in marriage. The first thing any woman in a serious relationship should determine is the ability and commitment of her man for marriage. There has to be a balance for that marriage proposal to come from the man. If there is any imbalance, there will be no proposal.
The key is marketing
Merely saying you want a husband will not get you one. If you do not know how to do it real time, worry will set in. That means you have to be empowered with the right tools. The principal tool you need is marketing. You have to understand the fundamental principles and applications of self marketing. You have to go out there and market yourself so that you do not make a wrong choice. If you want a husband apply marketing. This is a discipline you need to compete well in today’s marriage market. And the starting point is to discover who you are and understand who is a man.
Marketing is a skill as well as a discipline. It empowers you to gets results. It teaches you to focus on customers, to know their problems, to understand what drives men and what they want in wives. And if you know how to use what you have to package solutions for a man’s problems, you will sell.
Marketing also operates in the marriage market where men and women exchange values to become husbands and wives. This is the first lesson. In this market as in other markets, there are customers who are buying and selling. They are not buying and selling people; they are buying and selling solutions and companionship and in the process, exchange vows, trust, love and emotions. And what binds them together in marriage is the vow, “for better, for worse,” and what lubricates the relationship is love.
In this market, women are selling their domestic service, care, submission, solutions and help. The market is somehow different because women are not “bought,” as is done for soap or car. To sell well, you have to be well packaged and branded, appropriately priced, suitably promoted, available and visible to suitors.
The dynamics of this market are also controlled by the 4Ps of marketing. And the earlier you understand these fundamentals and how you can apply them to yourself, your drive to get a husband will be easier and quicker to accomplish. When it happens, your joy will be full.
Why are some women finding it difficult to get husbands? May be they do not know that marriage operates in a market. May be they lack marketing skills. Many of them really do not know this market exists and how it operates. They think that dating and getting married is all about romance, love, friendship and luck.
In a way they are right. But that is old order. The new order is that there is a marriage market where dating and romantic relationships which can lead to marriage operate. In today’s fast changing market, marriage is facilitated 80 per cent by marketing and 20 per cent by love. This ignorance is increasing worry among single women. They may not say so, but it is becoming visible.
Awareness
Men are more aware of this market and how it operates than the women. That is why they seem to have the upper hand in all dimensions of romantic and marital relationships. And they are ruled by logic, facts and figures unlike women who are ruled by emotions. Men perfectly understand that marriage is more of reality and business than emotions.
Love is blind. Not for men. They love with their eyes open, watching their pockets, the women they love and the changing dynamics in the market. They respond quickly to these changes. Women do not respond because they are blinded by emotions which shut them off reality. Men are more real in romantic relationships. And the bottom line is how it affects their pockets. They understand the forces of demand and supply operating there, and that 2+2, even in romance is equal to 4.
For women, it is all emotions, no market and no business. Women in love believe that 2+2 can equal 3 today and 5 tomorrow, depending on how they feel. Getting a husband quick is all about marketing you as a brand to suitors. So what are you selling? Is it your body or beauty? If you sell these, you will definitely cry later. Are you selling your time and energy? Watch out, you may be abandoned. Is it your service? It depends on what you are serving. “So what do I sell?” Sell the total woman in you as a brand.
The critical question you must answer to benefit from this book is, “Do I really know what I should sell and to whom? Who and what influence men to buy in this market?” Many women seeking husbands cannot answer this question and they do not know how to stand out from the crowd in the market. They are making mistakes that must be corrected.
It’s all about marketing. That is the message in this book. The principles that rule the marketing of goods and services in different markets also apply in the marriage market.
There is a social time bomb ticking in many parts of the world. If it is not detonated, it will explode with fatal consequences. Simply put, single women above 30 are finding it increasingly difficult to get husbands, whose supply seems to be reducing daily while demand for them is increasing. Why is this so? There are many reasons. Some are economic, others cultural and sociological. And the message is clear: The struggles of single women to get husbands are building into a destructive explosion. They need help to get the husbands they desire.
For some women, many forces stop them from getting husbands. Some of these forces are spiritual and psychological. And they have become a big burden for thousands of women worldwide. This is causing pain, emotional turmoil and regret for many marriageable women and their families. Yet no help seems to be coming. That help has come with this book.
The joy of every parent is to train his or her daughter through life and see her get married. This is the desire of every woman. And when she does not marry as at when due, her expectation of becoming a wife and a mother turns into frustration. This has to stop! What does it take for a parent to train a daughter and prepare her for marriage? Plenty of investments, training, care, advice, sacrifice and guidance over the years to equip her properly for the marital challenges she will face when she becomes a man’s wife.
So, what would be the vibes in any family where a girl born 30 years ago matures into a woman; she is well educated and ready for marriage but no husband is forth coming? Family quarrels will begin. Big daughter turns against her mother. This is the trademark of “senior girls” who want to get married, but the vicious forces rocking the market are making it increasingly difficult for them to do so.
The husbands are still there in the market no doubt. But as technology, markets and economies change, so are men changing their bridal perception and attitude to marriage. Besides, many marriageable men especially in the battered economies of African countries are becoming increasingly poor as income falls. If a man is not financially able, how can he marry? A good number of men have discovered to their dismay that though they are willing to marry, they are not able. There is pain on both sides of the marriage divide.
But the pressure is more on women because their biological clocks are ticking. The older they become, the less marketable they become in the marriage market. Not so with men. Even at 45, a man can comfortably marry a 20-year old girl so long as he is financially able. This challenge explains the statement, “I can and I will.” Five words loaded with desire and action. The problem I have identified for men and women, who want to marry, is not with the desire- I want or I will. It is with the ability to fulfill that desire, that is, I can.
The critical stages
Thousands of women above 30 years desire to get husbands. They are willing. But some of them cannot. Even if they can, they do so with pain, tension and delay. For men, it is a 50/50 split. One half wants to marry, but low-income power makes it difficult for them to do so. The other half can, but they are not willing. This one is a bigger problem. So when a single woman gets entangled with this can- do but will- not man, and she thinks she has everything going for her, she is in trouble.
She just cannot understand why Michael cannot propose marriage. She throws everything into the relationship, giving it all her time, emotions and self only to be disappointed. Then she weeps: “Oh God, I gave him everything.” What she fails to understand is that her strategy was wrong. All her attention was on the man’s ability- I can, without focusing on his commitment- I will, where the real problem lies.
Now you can understand why many relationships do not end in marriage. The first thing any woman in a serious relationship should determine is the ability and commitment of her man for marriage. There has to be a balance for that marriage proposal to come from the man. If there is any imbalance, there will be no proposal.
The key is marketing
Merely saying you want a husband will not get you one. If you do not know how to do it real time, worry will set in. That means you have to be empowered with the right tools. The principal tool you need is marketing. You have to understand the fundamental principles and applications of self marketing. You have to go out there and market yourself so that you do not make a wrong choice. If you want a husband apply marketing. This is a discipline you need to compete well in today’s marriage market. And the starting point is to discover who you are and understand who is a man.
Marketing is a skill as well as a discipline. It empowers you to gets results. It teaches you to focus on customers, to know their problems, to understand what drives men and what they want in wives. And if you know how to use what you have to package solutions for a man’s problems, you will sell.
Marketing also operates in the marriage market where men and women exchange values to become husbands and wives. This is the first lesson. In this market as in other markets, there are customers who are buying and selling. They are not buying and selling people; they are buying and selling solutions and companionship and in the process, exchange vows, trust, love and emotions. And what binds them together in marriage is the vow, “for better, for worse,” and what lubricates the relationship is love.
In this market, women are selling their domestic service, care, submission, solutions and help. The market is somehow different because women are not “bought,” as is done for soap or car. To sell well, you have to be well packaged and branded, appropriately priced, suitably promoted, available and visible to suitors.
The dynamics of this market are also controlled by the 4Ps of marketing. And the earlier you understand these fundamentals and how you can apply them to yourself, your drive to get a husband will be easier and quicker to accomplish. When it happens, your joy will be full.
Why are some women finding it difficult to get husbands? May be they do not know that marriage operates in a market. May be they lack marketing skills. Many of them really do not know this market exists and how it operates. They think that dating and getting married is all about romance, love, friendship and luck.
In a way they are right. But that is old order. The new order is that there is a marriage market where dating and romantic relationships which can lead to marriage operate. In today’s fast changing market, marriage is facilitated 80 per cent by marketing and 20 per cent by love. This ignorance is increasing worry among single women. They may not say so, but it is becoming visible.
Awareness
Men are more aware of this market and how it operates than the women. That is why they seem to have the upper hand in all dimensions of romantic and marital relationships. And they are ruled by logic, facts and figures unlike women who are ruled by emotions. Men perfectly understand that marriage is more of reality and business than emotions.
Love is blind. Not for men. They love with their eyes open, watching their pockets, the women they love and the changing dynamics in the market. They respond quickly to these changes. Women do not respond because they are blinded by emotions which shut them off reality. Men are more real in romantic relationships. And the bottom line is how it affects their pockets. They understand the forces of demand and supply operating there, and that 2+2, even in romance is equal to 4.
For women, it is all emotions, no market and no business. Women in love believe that 2+2 can equal 3 today and 5 tomorrow, depending on how they feel. Getting a husband quick is all about marketing you as a brand to suitors. So what are you selling? Is it your body or beauty? If you sell these, you will definitely cry later. Are you selling your time and energy? Watch out, you may be abandoned. Is it your service? It depends on what you are serving. “So what do I sell?” Sell the total woman in you as a brand.
The critical question you must answer to benefit from this book is, “Do I really know what I should sell and to whom? Who and what influence men to buy in this market?” Many women seeking husbands cannot answer this question and they do not know how to stand out from the crowd in the market. They are making mistakes that must be corrected.
It’s all about marketing. That is the message in this book. The principles that rule the marketing of goods and services in different markets also apply in the marriage market.
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